The Concept

The Concept

After six intense, jam-packed days of trainings, classes, meditation and chanting practice, on the seventh day we finally have a day of rest (haha). I thought I would take a moment to explain the concept behind our specific program, and, in some ways, behind Chinese monastic life in general.

First, there are rules for everything. There is a proper way to hold the meditation book, a proper way to wear a sidebag, a proper way to pull out chairs before sitting down, a proper way to fold a blanket, a proper way for arms to dangle by my side, etc.

Before we leave our place of residence (a hotel-like building for pilgrims and lay-practitioners) each day, we line-up from shortest to tallest, men facing women (and with about two yards separating us). When the venerable of discipline approves of our posture, he tells us to 合掌 (hezhang, put palms together in front of the sternum), and then to 问讯 (wenxun, to bow and then rise, lifting the hands, with the pointer fingers together, up to the eyebrows before coming back down to the sternum). The first couple days (and even yesterday), we apparently were not in unison, so we had to continue to wenxun until all 61 of us bowed and rose together. Then the two lines of men and women file out and we walk in silence to wherever we are going.

The 61 participants come from 17 different countries and over 45 colleges. Just about everyone has some academic background in Buddhism, and a few of us have a background in Chinese language. We are woken up every morning at 5:30am by the drumming of a woodenfish, and then we complete an hour of Tai Chi and seated meditation. We then have a short breakfast before 3 hours of class, taught by venerable monks and nuns who often spend more time answering questions than actually lecturing content.

On some days we help with community service around the monastery, cutting grass, sweeping, or moving boxes. On the first day, my group moved boxes from one side of a storage room to another. I was sure that we would be asked to move them back to their original places, but it hasn’t happened yet, hah.

We are encouraged not to talk, to always keep our eyes down at a 45 degree angle if not closed, and we are told to always be mindful of our body and, to a lesser extent, our surroundings. We are getting into a pattern of meditation, breakfast, class, lunch, walking meditation, seated meditation, community service and/or project work time, dinner, extracurricular classes, dharma talk (question and answer), meditation, and then evening chanting (vespers). Between these events, we may have 10 or so minutes to ourselves, but we are reminded that every moment should be an opportunity to focus on our bodies and our selves (which do not actually exist, hah). Needless to say, the 7 hours of sleep is often not enough for the 17 hours that are crammed with activities and “mindfulness”.

At first, I was a little vexed with all the rules, and got very tired of being scolded for pulling my chair out too far from the table. However, I have begun to understand the concept behind all this structure, all these rules:

We are not supposed to think. The venerable of discipline and the other staff members are trying to train us so that when we embark on our 7 day silent meditation retreat, we will not have to think about how to lay a pillow, or how to pull out a chair, or how to wait in line, or how to do anything. We need to reach the point where we are only thinking about being. Just being. Everything else should just be an action our body moves through.

We are trying to limit the amount of external stimuli that could possibly move our minds. By looking down and never engaging or paying close attention to our surroundings, we can focus on ourselves and our mind and just be. By falling into a pattern that will repeat every day, our bodies will know how to respond when it is time to go to eat or get up from bed.

We have learned a few details about the intensive meditation retreat that will commence next Monday, but for the most part it is shrouded in mystery. The meditation hall has been described as extremely plain and colorless, and so silent that the only thing that you can hear is the ringing of your own ears. This will probably be the only chance in my life to be completely silent (and taken care of) for seven days straight.

I feel a little nervous about the meditation retreat, as I still struggle to meditate for just half an hour during our daily sessions now. However, I have improved and am quite impressed that I can at least keep my lower back straight for 30 minutes now! I’m still working on controlling my mind and focusing on my breath, rather than merely thinking about my life and what I “know.”

One of my favorite aspects of life here at the monastery has been the dining ceremony; today, I was on the other side—I served the food, which was -quite- an experience. I hope to write an entry about that soon. In the meantime, I need to continue to focus as hard as I can, in every moment—I’ve realized that meditation is not something that only happens in a seated, lotus-posture. Meditation is something that monastics aim to engage in during their every move.